Confessions of a Weight Watcher

I am more than happy to share my good days so think its only fair to confess my sins on one of my worst days.

Yesterday was a disaster !

Why do I do it, everything is going great, back on track and losing again and then it goes wrong.  This list of food is not for the faint hearted and I think I could give Man v Food a run for his money but here goes

9.00am - Bacon and Sausage Sandwich - (not a small one either) bought from a sandwich van that come around work.  this is what happens when you don't have breakfast before you go to work and don't make the effort to take any.

9.45am - Malteser Cake - same sandwich van and 100% down to no will power.  Worst bit was it wasn't even that nice, mine tastes better but it didn't stop me inhaling it.

11.30am - Cadburys Twirl

1.30pm - McDonalds McChciken sandwich Meal, Large of course, with diet coke hoping the word "Diet"makes what I have eaten not so bad - yeah right !!

Mid afternoon - Cadburys Caramel- inhaled, ate it so fast don't really remember it.

5.15pm - Packet of Ritz Crackers - bought for my son but opened the multipack while driving home and one bag gone, guess I should be pleased I only ate one.

6.30pm - Mini Pizza and a few potato wedges - my brother had a small Halloween party for the kids and I wasn't having food but gave in, scarily when no one was looking.

7.45pm - Jumbo Sausage and chips for the chip shop - now not enjoying food but still eating it.

After 9pm - Pickled Onion Crisps, 4 or 5 chocolate fingers

                            

Omg what a pig I was - when you write it down, (because I obviously didn't track any of it) it looks worse than I remember.  But then why would I remember as most of it I ate with out thinking.

Now to the reason why, well I wish I knew.  Part of me had given myself a day off, with out really meaning too.  School holidays, hubby at home and I was just having to look after myself for lunch at work.  It was if I was giving myself the freedom to have what I want as Alan wasn't there to see me eat naughty food, and I could please myself as to what I had. ( Too much it would seem)

I also realised I am a bit of a secret eater, the only meals / food anyone saw me eat was after 6.30pm, only I knew how much I had consumed in one day.  Well now everyone can know and I am pleased to say today has been a lot better.  Not 100% mind, I am feeling the need to snack but have been having to argue with my will power again. i may blame mother nature and hormones and move on from it.  

I am now off work for a few days so need to try and keep on track while out of routine so going to make a big pan of homemade soup to keep me full and try not to be tempted with to many Halloween treats.

Let's hope my day of binging doesn't show too bad on Saturday after all not long til Christmas and I want a few more pounds off before then.

Dolittle xxx

Going Online

After nearly a year back at Weight Watchers I have decided to give WW Online a go.

Why ??

Well why not, over the last few months I have found getting to meetings more of a struggle than an enjoyment.  A mixture of Hubby working late so I don't stay as I have Jack, or something else comes up and becomes more important.  Then the meetings died down to very few people over the summer and i missed the support of other members, the meeting is small anyway so when only 3 or 4 people stay I wasn't coming away with anything.  Some weeks I was paying to stand on a set of scales - seems a waste.   And now the dark and cold nights are here and I really don't want to be going out on these nights so here I am an online member.

I didn't want to give up and I want to be subscribed to ww for when i get to goal and want to become a leader myself (well maybe). So after weeks of trying to decide what to do I decided to go online, £11.95 a month ( much cheaper than my meeting fees as i didn't have a monthly pass).  I am weighing at home every Saturday morning with Alan as my support, we are doing it together and he will keep me right. 

I have been online a week and I am already addicted to the WW app on my phone and Ipad, tracking everything as i go and not in my journal at the end of the day.  Its funny how seeing it on there makes it so much more real, you cant "tweak" or "guesstimate" how many pp are in things as the app is telling me how many. 

I have switched to have a few filling and healthy days, which are now alot more approachable for me than before.  I now choose them on busy days on a weekend, the kind of day when I know I will be too busy for snacking so no temptation to use weekly points, and too busy to have to worry about counting and measuring.  I still plan them in advance though to make sure I have the right things in.

I am loving Saturday morning weigh in's, weekends have always been my weight loss hot spots, the times it can all go wrong, then i would spend the next three days leading up to my midweek weigh in, either trying to starve myself, wracked with guilt, or thinking I had already blown it so start again Thursday.  Now if my weekend goes a little off track it can be my 49 weekly points, it was lovely last week not panicking for getting myself back on track for the Wednesday night.

My first week online resulted in another 3lb gone, this is more than i have lost in a few weeks, to the point I had been gaining again and heading backwards.  Making the decision to join online seems to have lifted a weight of my shoulders that I didn't realise I was carrying.  I feel good, I have had a great week and have another great week planned. 

It saddens me to think that my Yo Yo ing seems to have jeopardised my aim for 50lb this year, i was so determined to get there but I need to be realistic and just keep aiming to lose every week and not focus on how much, by when and for what.  Just for me to lose each week and get to goal sometime in the near future is enough.  No pressure !

Wish me luck x x x

Cooking it Slow . . .

My new favourite kitchen gadget is my slow cooker, to the point I have even bought a second smaller one.  

Big Cook Little Cook !!

 

I have had my bigger slow cooker for a couple of years but only ever made simple things in it, chicken in gravy or braising steak.  I was recently added to a facebook group for "Slow Cooker Saddo's" by a WW facebook friend, Sue, and my eyes were opened to a whole new world of cooking.  I thought slow cookers were for casseroles and soups but now i know different.

The lovely ladies at the weight watchers magazine kindly added a slow cooker recipe to the page with my column this month, Spanish Chicken and rice, and wow it was good.  I have now made it twice, modified the recipe to make it for one and the second time added Butternut squash chips and salad to fill my plate for no more points, my kind of food.  (This whole meal was only 9pp)

 

 

Tonight I have made homemade bread in the larger cooker to go with a huge pan of homemade bacon and lentil soup, warm, comforting food on cold, autumn nights, nothing nicer.  All of us liked the bread and i still cant believe how well it turned out.  I wouldnt make it every week as its not the lowest pointed bread at 3pp for 45g, but it was filling and really tasty.

 

 

Another success was Pulled Pork, great for a filling and healthy day so no counting or measuring.  I made mine into hot pork sandwiches inside WW petit pains, they were amazing.

A few things are not so weight watcher friendly, like the rice pudding I made but as long as I am cooking it I can easily work out the pro points per portion so I don't miss out on all the goodies I am making.

Jack wants me to make Nutella Swirls next and I want to try lasagne, the list is endless and I have never enjoyed cooking so many homemade meals as I am now.

Now to save for an Actifry or maybe ask Santa for one ;-)

Back to Basics

I have been unable to go to my weigh in tonight so I am unsure of how my week has gone, not too good if I go by my own assessment but then I wouldn't know as I haven't tracked. (slapped wrists I know)

What I have done this week is quite a lot of thinking, usually dangerous for me i know but all the same I have.  My week began with a few bad days and as the rollercoaster WW is I went through lots of stages and emotions as to why I do it, angry mainly as I should know better by now.  The whole "only half a pound" arguement kept rearing its ugly head and I realised I put too much pressure on myself to lose quicker than I do.

Why do I need more than half at a time?  I don't !  Aslong as its coming off and not going on I should be happy.

I then realised I have been doing this all year, setting myself targets of where to get to by certain dates and then when I don't I feel like a failure, which in turn makes me feel low, and then when I feel low I turn to food, no surprise there tho.

I also realised how much I do to try and show others I can do this, when stupidly I already know I can.  I know I will get to goal, no doubt in my mind it's just when.

So no more pressure, no more worrying what others think or feeling I need to prove myself by losing it fast.  I can only learn more by finding my way, no matter how long or hard, and the more I learn the more I can pass on if I ever follow up the idea of being a leader.

So here I am, new week, and I have decided its simply a week of back to basics.

Plan Shop Track

 

My challenge this week is to do what it says on the tin, weight watchers works if you do what it says, so I have planned as you can see from my pictures.  Both food plan and moving more plan ready to follow (let's not call it exercise as its evil lol)  I am out Saturday so no plan as I don't know where I will be and I have a training day next Wednesday so will play that by ear when I am there, other than that I am sticking to it and will share my normal menu pictures on Facebook for all to see.
This may not seem like much of a challenge but as I have gotten out of the habit of tracking i see it as an important challenge.

Here we go again, hoping to get to meeting next week if i am back from training, but if not I will find another one to make sure I know where I am at.
Dolittle x x 

September Challenge

Lets start with the good news, i lost 5lb tonight and i am over the moon with it.  Four weeks away from meetings and gained 4lb Then to lose it plus a little more the week after is amazing, just showing that if you get straight back into it you can stop it spiralling out of control.  Now to keep the momentum going.

Another month has passed, or near enough and it means I am one step closer to the end of 2013.  2013, my year to shine ! and as much as I feel I have gained a little of my sparkle back I am far from shining.  I will reach my 50lb by the end of the year, and don't doubt it but feel I need a little bit of a challenge to help get me there.  Don't get me wrong it's not my motivation, getting to goal is my motivation but short term focus gets you through each month.

So here I am setting myself, and anyone that wants to join me, a September challenge.  A short term goal, a little bit of something to drive us forward, keep me focussed and something to spend my week concentrating on.  

I challenge myself to 3 simple things:

1. Lose 7lb in September - I am giving myself 5 weigh in days taking me to the first Wednesday in October, just before my wedding anniversary.

2. Each week I will try at least one new food, whether it be a recipe, a ready meal, a vegetable, just something new that I haven't tried before, after all weight watchers is a lifestyle change so small changes are to be made.

3. Each week I will try something new in my attempt to Move More, Sit Less.  I recently described exercise as my WW Achilles heal, the one thing I can't seem to learn to love so time to try new things even if it is only once, I will try.

That's it, simple.  

17 weeks til Christmas brings home the reality of how long I have to lose my 19lb to reach my 50lb goal, it's a reminder of how fast the weeks and months are flying past, and before I know it I will be reflecting on 2013 and wondering if I achieved what I wanted.  So far so good !

The new magazine hit the meetings today, I have been moved to the members section in the back, especially there for members of weight watcheexcluding I can be classed as exclusive lol.  it's an amazing feeling being able to share this journey with like minded people who understand how it feels to struggle to lose weight.   

Night all, Dolittle x x 

Better late than never

Finally getting round to updating, only one word to describe my date with the scales this week - Gutted 

Half a pound, really only half a pound.  To say I wasn't amused was an understatement.  Tried so hard, was enthusiastic, motivated, positive, all of the right feelings, then half a pound Grrrrrrrrr.

So as I do in true WW fashion I have a few bad days, instead of doing the right thing and giving myself some great advice that I would have given anyone else, the simple it will catch up next week, or it's still a loss, or keep going and it will show more next week, no instead of going with common sense I went into a "sod it I am having what I want today, which went into two days. Ah why do I do it to myself.  

Stupid thing is I was out with my first WW leader on Thursday and when i didn't hesitate at the dessert board she asked " is this because of last nights weigh in". I said no just having a night off, she obviously knows me very well.

Well today is a new day, full of motivation again so planned my week, been shopping this morning and have spent all afternoon on the kitchen making batches of meals ready for this week.  So chuffed with myself, a £5 pack of extra lean mince has made 2 lasagne, 2 portions of savoury mince ready for shepherds pie and mince and dumplings for Alan and a huge bowl of chilli busy cooking in the slow cooker , the kitchen smells amazing and the feeling of satisfaction is making me feel great.  To the point I am typing so fast and making lots of mistakes, it's like a cooking adrenaline rush haha.

Not sure if it that makes make sad, but I can handle slim and sad lol

As for this weeks challenge I decided another new recipe was on the cards after my very successful Pulled Pork last week.  This week is Fanta Chicken and BBQ pulled pork, not to mention another omelette.  And trying to add in some fruit, not a fan of it, don't think it's worth eating what I don't enjoy BUT I know it's good for me and I am trying to encourage Jack to eat more so trying to lead by example.  Also trying to have different breakfasts as its so easy to have the same thing everyday.

As for exercise, well other than still thinking its evil I have decided on a new approach to exercise this week.  I realised last week that climbing the eiffel tower was a little ambitious but managed it by weigh in on Wednesday, (not that it showed at the scales) Not so much because I couldn't physically do it but time to fit it in was tricky for me.

I have always said I didn't have time for exercise, not being quite sure if i was just making excuses, but last week showed I don't have much time.  I was doing small sets of climbing the stairs then realising late at night I still had more to do, 11pm is not the time to be marching up and down your stairs like a pet elephant.

This week I have decided to do at least three sets of ten a day, whether it be 10 minutes walk in my lunch time, 10 minutes on my vibro machine, 10 times up and down the stairs, 10 minutes on the wii fit.  I can fit in small amounts during my day but I cannot fit in half hours here and there.  I often see people losing more than me, faster than me and I want to lose my weight faster then I realise they don't have my life.  My life is a full time working wife and mum,  leave home at 8am and return about 5.30pm,  feed my son and spend some much needed time with him, then make tea for Alan and I. By the time we are all done its nearer 8pm.  I don't want to or have time to attend 5 exercise classes a week, or time to go to the gym every other night, so I will just have to except my weight will come off slower than people that can do that.

Fingers crossed I haven't done too much damage in the last two days and can lose more than a stupid half pound this week.  (I know it's still a loss but it's not good enough grrr)

Right off out for a meal, no dessert for me this time tho x x x x x

Loving a Challenge

I am absolutely loving having this challenge ! 

My exercise challenge is to climb the Eiffel Tower before next weigh in, or the equivalent steps on my stair case.  (An idea I got from my Leader a few months back when she suggested climbing the Empire State Building). So I have over 1700 steps to do this week and it's harder than I thought.  I have been doing it in smaller batches of up and down the stairs 5 or 6 times and i can feel it in my legs, realising how unfit I am but pushing me to do the next ones.  The first day I didn't do my 22 sets but have caught up with myself today and will try and get ahead tomorrow as it seems easier on a weekend.

My food challenge is to try new recipes or to try something new so I am going to make pulled pork in the slow cooker tomorrow for Sunday lunch as we are out all day.  I hope it's nice or Alan & Jack will be cursing me.  Recipe was for BBQ pork but they don't like that so amending it to normal stock.

As much as my long term goal is simply to get to goal I like having short term mini missions as I call it.  If I was to keep telling myself I have 17 weeks to lose 19lb I would think its ages away yet and before I  know it I would have only 7 weeks and still need to lose 19lb.  This way I am looking no further forward than 5 weeks and know I want at least 7lb by then.

Setting myself a challenge has got me excited about WW again, I'm buzzing and the comments and encouragements others doing it with me on my facebook page is great, all in this together, climbing our way to being slim.

I can't wait to see the view of Paris when I get to the top !  I wonder where I can go next week . . .